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11 June 2010 @ 01:14 am
[Real Life] The Art of Trolling  
So there is a girl I don't like. I went to Greece with her last year. For two weeks she was rude to both me and kenderspouch . She refused to eat Greek food at all limiting where we could eat. She practically stole my PSP, DS and iPod and sulked when I asked for them back. She would sulk if things didn't go her way. She'd randomly shout at us for doing nothing or just asking her what was wrong. She ignored us for the last few days and stormed off without us plenty of times. At the airport she threw a tantrum because we won at Poker because she was dumb with her money. She then left us at Heathrow without saying goodbye and just walked off. Although she later apologised to kenderspouch , who she had to live with, I never recieved an apology.

After that, I pretty much hated her guts. In any case, me and kenderspouch  remained friends and got on fine. However it was clear that this other friend was a problem. She was dirty, never socialised or came out of her room, and argued about the bills. She was a stickler about stupid things and often got into fights with other housemates. In general, she was a grade A bitch.

Well, this all came to a head a few weeks ago. There were guests around, including myself. This 'friend' of ours had swept out her room for another guest. She'd left great swathes of hair all over the communal landing and when called on it said it was someone elses. Well, process of elimination (long dark hair... no one else in the building WITH long dark hair) meant that it was hers. We swept it into her room as a point that MOST people would get. She swept it back out. It got put in her bed this time. She put it back out.

Further revenge was in order. The details are hazy but we came into possession of some Sex Cheques. You make have seen these. These are like IOUs but for sexual favours. Now this girl is the most frigid person you will meet. She screams 'EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWW!' if you say 'penis' in front of her. So we thought we'd have a bit of fun writing on the cheques. Some were quite mean (we were all drunk by that point) but some were just humourous or written by people who didn't even KNOW her. The night drew to a close, we hid the chequebook in kenderspouch 's bedroom with the intention of her never seeing it and that was that.

A few weeks later (i.e. a few days ago) the bitch moves out and leaves this rather pissy email for my friend. I have bolded interesting bits:

What is your problem? (If thats sounds mean, i'm sorry) I took my tv because it is mine and I was moving house. I didn't say goodbye because the last time I saw or heard for you I was being called every name under the sun. When I went back to the house the Tuesday before last I may have told you my plans, but when I went to check if I had any mail I found my novelty cheque book in your room. I wasn't looking in your room, I was just stepping over stuff when I found it. Before that I thought that maybe none of what happened was your fault because you didn't say anything but when I saw your handwriting inside along with the horrible comments I didn't see the point in telling you. I may have put on fb that I was upset with the fuss on that night as well as calling C a horrible name, something that was rash- i'll admit but I never expected either of you to enter my room and go through my personal things. Not once did I think about doing anything like that to you guys because even I thought that was too much. 
When my sisters heard what was happening they were angry and wanted to talk to you and C, I didn't want them to but they did and when my elder sister came with me on the Tuesday (because she was buying my old computer off me) she saw how upset I was about you and C going into my room she told me to take my tv. 
Anyway, I had enough of talking about this. If your angry with me for taking the tv then theres not much to say about that because i'm still a bit upset to be honest. I thought I knew the pair of you. I can get over the argument- we have arguments, but what I can't seem to forget is how people I thought I knew could invade my privacy. If your angry about me not saying goodbye then again, not much I can say. I'm just trying to forget about it, I hope you can do the same. 
I will contact you and Cl at some point (over email) about payment/splitting of bills. Have a good life.

Well, that's pretty much the kind of reasoning we expect from her. Feel bad for her? Don't. This is just a ploy. She doesn't understand that you can't treat people like shit and expect them to like you. Seriously, she chose JDRAMA over hanging out with people who she will never see after she graduates. Her actual friends (although they aren't anymore because she pulled this shit).

For a start, the chequebook was hidden under kenderspouch 's yaoi, which would mean that the sex afraid crazy bitch would have been rummaging around her room trying to find SOMETHING. Kind of negates the 'invasion of privacy' thing as at that point there was nothing to find. Her sisters also can't talk to us because quite simply, we didn't do anything wrong until SHE provoked us into hysterical revenge taking. She didn't know the people she lived with, clearly, because she quite simply didn't realise how much they disliked her and had only spent probably the equivalent of a day in their company in all the time she'd lived with them.

So in response to this, kenderspouch wrote back. The following email is the most epic RL trolling I have ever seen. And for the record, yes, that really did happen. AND there was vomit on there too.

Wow, all your e-mail consists of just theory based on nothing but speculation due to weak 'evidence'. Thank god you're not going to be a police officer. Several people had to go in and out of your room as one of our guests became ill and needed to go to sleep. As a consequence, neither C, I or K 'rummaged' through your possessions. We cannot pin point who brought the check-book down, but it certainly wasn't any of us.

Furthermore, my comment in the check-book wasn't anything spiteful against you. I don't know what else was written in it, but at the same time we were all very very very drunk at the time, therefore what was written was based on running emotions such as your friend who was out of order a couple of days previous (she was completely out of order for slamming the door in our faces, especially when K and Ke were visiting) and due to your comments made to C, which were far worse than anything I did combined.

And BTW, yes the heating will be £500, but we are going to work out exactly what WE need to pay, as you were the only one using it constantly and we don't feel that it is fair for us to pay what we didn't use. We will work out our fair share. 

At the end of the day, you and your sister were in the wrong for taking basic needs from this house without informing anyone, such as the toaster, kettle and BATH PLUG which we need. It is basic knowledge that you give your house mates warning before you leave or leave the items to be picked up on a later date where it doesn't affect the living conditions of the house. 

btw- R had sex in your bed

R also vomitted in it too as she was so drunk she passed out. I reckon Kenders is keeping the best bit until last.

This will be updated when more epic lulz occur.

[EDIT] More evidence of bitchery:

Pink Haired Zombie Deluxe: RE5: Umbrella Wesker- It was all part ofyiyo_chan on June 11th, 2010 12:31 am (UTC)
Epic e-mail ending is epic ? Y/Y ?
Kategrownupneko on June 11th, 2010 12:32 am (UTC)
It's basically the only reason I made this post. TIS EPICNESS.
Pink Haired Zombie Deluxe: SH3- Silent Lolyiyo_chan on June 11th, 2010 12:35 am (UTC)
photobucket epic win Pictures, Images and Photos

I'll just leave this here..
Kategrownupneko on June 11th, 2010 12:38 am (UTC)
(Deleted comment)
Kategrownupneko on June 11th, 2010 01:34 am (UTC)
And so true XD
Anto J Lareneg: Wotantoj on June 11th, 2010 01:45 am (UTC)
hearing about terrible roommates is one reason i am scared of moving out.
Kategrownupneko on June 11th, 2010 01:47 am (UTC)
Well to be fair, we're having a lot of fun trolling her.
Anto J Lareneg: DOUCHEBAGantoj on June 11th, 2010 01:49 am (UTC)
I CAN SEE THAT. idk if i'd call this trolling though lol.

i mean

its still pretty awesome.

but yeah.
bearcl on June 11th, 2010 02:19 am (UTC)
Ok I am one of the unlucky people that lived with her... and honestly this Sums it up perfectly!!!
oni_link001oni_link001 on June 11th, 2010 03:47 pm (UTC)
*standing ovation* My favorite thing that happens to QQers and bitches is when trolls ban together to take them down. THIS IS WIN.

(Also its especially great karma when you don't even need to explain what the little effs did to you because they've pissed the people you're talking to off. Basically when they're own stupidity is their undoing.)
Kategrownupneko on June 11th, 2010 03:51 pm (UTC)
lol We're doing our best. The only reason I explained on here is because I don't have RL friends on here that much but I wanted to log her epic fail so that at some point I can throw it all back in her face.

Trolling on twitter is funner than I thought it would be.